DOING THE WORK | Life Smarts

DOING THE WORK

Back in November of 2016 I was contacted by an acquisitions editor from New Harbinger Press who had seen some of writing online about developing mindfulness Life Skills beyond the "101 level." He expressed they were interested in continuing with the success they'd had with other notable mindfulness authors. To be considered to have "a seat at the table" with these revered teachers would be a huge opportunity to share my own lived experiences and earned wisdom with those whose lives it may benefit.

I also felt both excited and honored, as seeing a book I'd written in a bookstore was a dream I'd had since I was a child.

Although I'd self-published a journal/workbook in 2007 titled Affirmative Actions: Eyes Open Meditations for Women (prompted by my experience as a student of a charismatic, smart, funny, now-deceased-by-suicide guy who'd proclaimed to be an "enlightened master" and supporter of women - but turned out to be a narcissistic, abusive, predatory, manipulative fraudster ... see my Intro excerpt ... ), I did not have the money, marketing wizardry, or frankly the ego required to make it a huge success all on my own, and it so it never had the reach I'd hoped for.

I'd prefaced that book by saying:

Before we begin, there are a couple questions I’d like for you to ask yourself and answer with radical self-honesty:

Is the way you are living your life - all the thoughts you have, and all the choices, behaviors and actions you take in every moment of every day - serving you personally - as well as contributing positively to the collective human populace?

If yes, are you absolutely certain?

If you are, then you don’t need to go any further. You are fully enlightened and we are deeply blessed to have
you amongst all the rest of us imperfect human beings. (note: joking intended)

If not, are you willing to Do the Work do continuously refine your own imperfections, step by step, day by day?

Please think on this for several minutes before you go to the next page...

01PrefaceSAMPLE.pdf

This PDF is a copy of the Preface to Doing the Work I submitted in my book proposal.

So when this editor requested a book proposal from me, I told him I was not interested in regurgitating what had already been written about mindfulness, and in my honest opinion, it was time to move to the conversation to the next level. I told him I wanted it to be a "compassionate kick in the pants." He was open to that. I spent two months working on a proposal for what I wanted to be titled Doing the Work: Living by Mindful Example including what I was asked to submit: an annotated table of contents; descriptions of what each chapter will contain (two paragraphs each); and two sample chapters of my book for their review.

They'd also wanted me to provide them three reasons why my book was unique and compelling, and to list three books sold on Amazon at the time that most closely resembled what my book was about, and what was the most unique and compelling feature that made mine different. Since NO ONE had written a book like what I was about to propose, I felt the door I'd been waiting for practically all my life to open was inviting me in. Ecstatically grateful is too mild to express how I felt. I sent it over to them in late January 2017 with both the humble and confident belief that this was meant to be. I mean, after all, "new harbinger" means "bringer of the new" and so who better to publish it than these folks?

Sadly, I was wrong. I was the told by the editor that "publishing is all about repackaging what was already said" and even though they liked it, they were not willing to take the risk on something THIS different unless I was already a big name author. Since I'd been clear and upfront about what I wanted to propose and he didn't see any of it as disqualifying, I felt deflated and disrespected.

I wrote him back after I received his rejection letter and calmly expressed my disappointment - and then concluded by saying:

"I really wish you had told me what you did in your email yesterday last November. It is yet another experience in my path as a mindfulness educator that didn't turn out like I'd hoped, but perhaps in the Big Picture has given me what I needed. As I said to you, the horse has been let out of the barn, and although I feel broken hearted, you gave me the nudge to begin to put together what I humbly know is of great value for those who want guidance on what to do and how to live beyond the basics."

I felt it was not only their loss, but also I truly believed that what was contained within would help many people. I still do.
After all, it wasn't about me or some "brand" I was trying to package and sell.

Since that experience, I've spent years teaching the latest Mindsets and Skillsets topics that Organizational Learning and Development managers requested me to propose for their company's employees, and have observed that the systems in place do not provide the environment to make ANY of it "sticky" because a) they don't REALLY want to Do The Work to make it stick, and b) teaching all these valuable Mindsets and Skillsets in a "one and done" piecemeal manner (often promoted by trainers who are just monetizing the latest trends and often don't have deep grasp of the power each one possesses) and so they don't become adopted company-wide because they CAN'T be. Every proposal always has to include the expected Return Upon their financial Investment (ROI) and never once were they curious about the Costs of Inaction (COI). If the needle didn't move afterward they blamed it on the subject matter and NOT the reasons why it was doomed to fail from the start. I've brought my best, but as in most areas of my Life, I don't fit in with the rigid-systems way of doing things in the corporate world.

I've continued to write and teach about Doing the Work ever since, and almost a decade later, many books similar to what I proposed in 2017 have been published and sold on Amazon - but nothing quite as boldly in the "tough love" and "compassionate kick in the pants" ways I talk about the Adventure of innerevolution and sustainable growth and change ... and doing so in service of our fellow imperfect human beings. Growth and change can be messy and scary at best - but clinging to the old, worn-out status quo and a bug-ridden personal Inner Operating System will never get you where you claim you want to be. Instant gratification, entitlement attitudes, "six weeks to self-mastery" or indulging short attention spans will work. Neither will "manifesting" it without lifting a finger and getting your hands dirty. Every bit of learning, knowledge, and wisdom of lasting value is earned.

You have to Do The Work to Make The Work actually Work.